If all else fails this year, some idealists from the 80’s are looking closely at Vanilla Ice for President.
On Facebook, some have started writing his platform:
Vanilla Ice on why he’s running: “If there was a problem, Yo, I’ll solve it.”
Vanilla Ice’s drug policy: “If my rhyme was a drug, I’d sell it by the gram.”
Vanilla Ice on crime: “Anything less than the best is a felony.”
Vanilla Ice on foreign policy: “Now you’re amazed by the VIP posse, steppin’ so hard like a German Nazi…”
Vanilla Ice on healthcare: “You’re pitchin’ a fit, so step back and endure; let the witch doctor, Ice, do the dance to cure.”
Vanilla Ice on the environment: “Cause my style’s like a chemical spill.”
Vanilla Ice on immigration: “Shay with a gauge and Vanilla with a nine, ready for the chumps on the wall.”
Vanilla Ice on energy: “Turn off the lights and I’ll glow.”
Vanilla Ice on Sarah Palin: “Ice Ice Baby, Ice Ice Baby. All right stop, collaborate and listen.”
(Actually that makes so little sense that Palin may steal it)
Vanilla Ice on campaign supporters: “The girlies on standby, Waving just to say Hi. Did you stop? No — I just drove by.”
Vanilla Ice on giving speeches: “Take heed, ’cause I’m a lyrical poet.”
Vanilla Ice on how he’d end his acceptance speech: “Yo man — Let’s get out of here! Word to your mother!”